Honey, I KonMari'ed My Trumpet!
Now, you don't use all these words in the same sentence everyday!
“To quietly work away at disposing of your own excess is actually the best way of dealing with a family that doesn’t tidy.”
As obsessed as I am with the Konmari Method, I never asked Mr. TEA to start his tidying festival. I'm very aware that I am the main contributor when it comes to clutter in our house. Mr. TEA doesn't own a lot of stuff to begin with, which is a good thing, since he's somewhat a believer of creative mess. He is one of the most creative person I've known. I respect his preferences and largely leave him and his stuff alone albeit occasional complaints, especially when I'm stressed.
Since I attended the Konmari Consultant Seminar and got unstuck with my own tidying festival, he was intrigued, but stayed on the sideline cheering me on; after seeing the progress I made as a consultant trainee with one of his old friends, he casually commented, "Maybe I can use some help tidying, too."
This is so unexpected that it took me a day to realize what he's said, and Mr. TEA became one of my practice clients.
We don't have much time to work together, mostly only after our 4-year-old goes to sleep, but we made so much progress! Mr. TEA is a very willing and motivated client. Though he already doesn't have much, (he's been casually tidying up over the years when I'm going through my own stuff) we were still able to discard a few pieces of clothes that don't fit, a few books that no longer spark joy, and nearly half of the paperwork he still kept. Everything went so smoothly so far, that I thought he really doesn't need my help.
Until I saw the shiny trumpet in its opened case in the middle of our living room.
Why a nice instrument ended up in the middle of our living room that morning is a creative mystery (to me anyway.) Since I'm now a legit Konmari Consultant Trainee, my curiosity overcame the usual internal annoyance that emerges when I see things showing up where they don't belong.
"Does this spark joy?" I put on my consultant hat while still in my pajama, pointed at the trumpet and asked Mr. TEA the question with sincere curiosity.
He looked at me, surprised, then very quickly said a firm, "No. No, it doesn't."
"Why do you still keep it, then?"
"I don't know. Guess 'cause I always have it?" (Always means since high school in this case.)
That evening, he posted his trumpet on craigslist.
Similar stories like how this trumpet ended up in the middle of a suburban living room being abused by a toddler probably exist in most American families: we get into some activities in school because our families and/or friends got into it; we acquire the nicest equipment we can afford at the time for said activities without considering if we really enjoy it nor how long we plan to do it; we stop doing it after graduating because we don't actually enjoy it that much, and the nice equipment ended up in a closet somewhere in our parents' home.
The difference in this story is that Mr. TEA started cleaning up his belongings at his parents' home, took them back to our place so that they can sit in our own closet, and now they're being reconsidered during his tidying festival. Tidying brings these forgotten items back into our awareness so we can re-evaluate what we own and their purposes.
I'm happy to report that the trumpet found a good home. It was sold, less than two days after being listed, to a local music instructor! He's really a trombone player, but would like to have a "real trumpet" so that he can play along with his students. Since real trumpets these days cost more than 3 grand, a 22-year-old real trumpet in good condition becomes a great option for him.
Tuned the trumpet one last time, thanked it for its years of service, and said goodbye.
When David, the music instructor, stopped by to pick up the trumpet, our little family huddled in my study listening to him testing it out. (He said he's not very good at playing the trumpet, which is totally untrue to our amateurish ears, and would like some privacy playing so he doesn't feel too self-conscious.) Our dogs were howling along with him and our son ran out after a few minutes just to look at him play. It was a very nice moment, probably the nicest, we shared with this trumpet in our home.
David was super happy with the condition of the instrument. Mr. TEA also gave him all the music books he had, which comes in handy for a music instructor. Not everything we discarded can be reused, which is why we really need to pay close attention to what material possession we bring into our life; but to give something you owned a second life feels so much better than letting it sit in a dark closet.
In this case, the trumpet is no longer a hobby komono, but more of a sentimental item to Mr. TEA, since it's a reminder of his school years. He later said it represents his childhood music life which he didn't really enjoy all that much. Saying goodbye to the trumpet gave him space to rethink what instrument he really wants to play. He's seriously considering learning to play cello now!
Do you have something of value but no longer spark joy? Have you considered why you still have it, and what it means to you? Are these reasons enough for you to keep holding on to these items, or is it possible to give it a second chance in someone else's life?
— May We All Live Tided Ever After!